It's time for a blog tell all. Well, not all, but more than usual.
1. I am not handling Clark's departure anywhere near as well as I thought I would. Almost two weeks out and I am seriously missing him. His absence leaves a pretty big hole in the family. You probably shouldn't ask me about him because I will start crying. I cried when I dropped a package off for him at the UPS for same day MTC delivery. I cried when I listened to his music playlist. I cried when a friend sent me a picture of him from a scout camp-out five years ago. I cried when I went downstairs to get something from the storage room. I've developed a twitch in my left eye-- I suspect from all the crying.
I'm going to give myself the benefit of the doubt and say that some of my emotions are hormonal. I don't want him to know how frequently I'm losing it. Of course I know he's doing a great thing! Of course I know I wouldn't want him anywhere else! Of course there will be blessings and good things that come of his service.
But right now, I miss him. I always thought everything about a missionary going out was happy and exciting. I'd even see other moms losing it and I'd think, "Why? This is a wonderful thing. "
That wasn't very considerate or understanding of me, because now I'm the one boo-hoo-hooing.
He's just fine-- better than fine, and I'd appreciate it very much if nobody reading this mentions my hysteria to the boy.
2. Hopefully she is on the mend, but poor little Greta has been sick with double ear infections and fevers and about three months (or more) of a runny nose. Partly because of her lack of speech, I suspect we may be headed down the path of tubes in her ears (same as Peter had) because she's had fluid in her ears for quite some time. We shall see, but I don't want things to drag on as long as they did with Peter. I may have to be a little firm with the Dr. if she suggests a wait and see approach.
3. We've done a slight room rearrange this past week. No, it doesn't involve Clark's empty basement room. Our hope is to finish the basement in this next year, so it's remaining empty for a little while. Greta came out of the closet.
That is to say, she moved out of the pack-n-play in our closet she has been sleeping in for the past year and into the crib in Elinor's room. Peter moved out of the crib and into the boys room. He and George share a bed-- not just a room, but the actual bed. Whatever, little kids can sleep anywhere. He's been doing a marvelous job of settling down and staying in his bed. So, that is something.
4. Abe and I joined a couple of my siblings and my parents at a showing of Darkest Hour (a movie about Winston Churchill) this evening. The movie was fantabulous! I highly recommend. What I don't recommend is getting into a rather heated disagreement with one's husband over the legality of parking outside of the marked parking spaces at 10 pm in a deserted Walmart Neighborhood Market parking lot. I'm certain that at some point, maybe even tomorrow, the argument will be humorous. I admit, I am emotionally volatile right now.
5. I don't mind January so much. February is another thing, but January is kind of nice. Routine, a slower schedule, normality. Well, there would be more normality if I could stop crying for a couple of days, but still, more normality than December. And even though I like this pace of life better, I do find it challenging to come down off the the frenzied excitement of December. It's like I want to slow down, but I feel anxious slowing down-- like I'm forgetting to do important things. Shoot, it seems like I'm somewhat darned if I do stay busy and darned if I slow down. I'm going to have to ponder this dilemma. It seems unhealthy.
6. George has been taking dance for a couple of years at a local dance studio that we really like--Wasatch Arts Center . They have a wonderful, nurturing atmosphere, beautiful choreography, great teachers, and very appropriate costumes (not such an issue for boys, but appreciated nonetheless). Now that Nutcracker is over, Cannon is back doing tap there, although he is at Ballet West for ballet and contemporary. Bethany got tap shoes for Christmas so she could do a tap class there as well. And then, I asked Faith is she might like to try tap and be in the same class as the boys. She jumped at the idea. So Team Middle Kids are all in a tap class together and Bethany's class is immediately after theirs. And the very best part? The studio owner gave us killer deal for all these classes. I won't say how much, but I feel like we're committing highway robbery! Sometimes things just work out.
7. When I was a mom with only little kids, every day lasted forever! I remember looking for things to do to fill my time. So much to do, but such monotony as well. Older, more experienced moms would say, "Enjoy it! It goes so fast!".
Really? Really? This doesn't feel like it's going fast!
18 years into this parenting thing and I am SHOCKED at the speed at which time as flown.
Yep, I'm crying again.
And it is just getting faster. Another year from now and Bethany will be getting ready to head to college. Elinor is a freshman in high school-- passionate about swim team.
I think I'm some sort of mourning for the end of this phase of life-- but that doesn't make much sense because Greta is 18 months and I still have roughly 17 years of her being a minor in our house. It's just that now I see how little time that actually is and I'm sort of pitching a big ol' Mom fit about it. Perhaps I will have had my fill of parenting by the time everyone has moved on and I've had 35 years experience. Perhaps I'm emotionally panicking unnecessarily. So unlike me to emotionally panic unnecessarily.
Actually, it is very much like me.
8. Sounds like tomorrow needs to be a day where we all stay in pajamas and read. That sounds lovely. Not possible, but lovely.
9. I thoroughly enjoy reclaiming my bedroom closet this week. It's not a huge closet to begin with, but it was markedly smaller and less accessible with Greta's bed in it. It is easier to keep a tidy room when you have access to your closet. And kids like to come visit with you in a clean room more so than in a messy room. And lately, I really like the kids coming to visit and chat with me. So that's a win/win.
10. Okay, well, this was cathartic for me to blah, blah, blog. Clark, I don't know if you're allowed to check this blog on the mission or not. If you do come across this post, you know Iam will be totally fine. I'm like Bethany-- I cry to relieve stress. It doesn't mean there is actually a problem.
1. I am not handling Clark's departure anywhere near as well as I thought I would. Almost two weeks out and I am seriously missing him. His absence leaves a pretty big hole in the family. You probably shouldn't ask me about him because I will start crying. I cried when I dropped a package off for him at the UPS for same day MTC delivery. I cried when I listened to his music playlist. I cried when a friend sent me a picture of him from a scout camp-out five years ago. I cried when I went downstairs to get something from the storage room. I've developed a twitch in my left eye-- I suspect from all the crying.
I'm going to give myself the benefit of the doubt and say that some of my emotions are hormonal. I don't want him to know how frequently I'm losing it. Of course I know he's doing a great thing! Of course I know I wouldn't want him anywhere else! Of course there will be blessings and good things that come of his service.
But right now, I miss him. I always thought everything about a missionary going out was happy and exciting. I'd even see other moms losing it and I'd think, "Why? This is a wonderful thing. "
That wasn't very considerate or understanding of me, because now I'm the one boo-hoo-hooing.
He's just fine-- better than fine, and I'd appreciate it very much if nobody reading this mentions my hysteria to the boy.
2. Hopefully she is on the mend, but poor little Greta has been sick with double ear infections and fevers and about three months (or more) of a runny nose. Partly because of her lack of speech, I suspect we may be headed down the path of tubes in her ears (same as Peter had) because she's had fluid in her ears for quite some time. We shall see, but I don't want things to drag on as long as they did with Peter. I may have to be a little firm with the Dr. if she suggests a wait and see approach.
3. We've done a slight room rearrange this past week. No, it doesn't involve Clark's empty basement room. Our hope is to finish the basement in this next year, so it's remaining empty for a little while. Greta came out of the closet.
That is to say, she moved out of the pack-n-play in our closet she has been sleeping in for the past year and into the crib in Elinor's room. Peter moved out of the crib and into the boys room. He and George share a bed-- not just a room, but the actual bed. Whatever, little kids can sleep anywhere. He's been doing a marvelous job of settling down and staying in his bed. So, that is something.
4. Abe and I joined a couple of my siblings and my parents at a showing of Darkest Hour (a movie about Winston Churchill) this evening. The movie was fantabulous! I highly recommend. What I don't recommend is getting into a rather heated disagreement with one's husband over the legality of parking outside of the marked parking spaces at 10 pm in a deserted Walmart Neighborhood Market parking lot. I'm certain that at some point, maybe even tomorrow, the argument will be humorous. I admit, I am emotionally volatile right now.
5. I don't mind January so much. February is another thing, but January is kind of nice. Routine, a slower schedule, normality. Well, there would be more normality if I could stop crying for a couple of days, but still, more normality than December. And even though I like this pace of life better, I do find it challenging to come down off the the frenzied excitement of December. It's like I want to slow down, but I feel anxious slowing down-- like I'm forgetting to do important things. Shoot, it seems like I'm somewhat darned if I do stay busy and darned if I slow down. I'm going to have to ponder this dilemma. It seems unhealthy.
6. George has been taking dance for a couple of years at a local dance studio that we really like--Wasatch Arts Center . They have a wonderful, nurturing atmosphere, beautiful choreography, great teachers, and very appropriate costumes (not such an issue for boys, but appreciated nonetheless). Now that Nutcracker is over, Cannon is back doing tap there, although he is at Ballet West for ballet and contemporary. Bethany got tap shoes for Christmas so she could do a tap class there as well. And then, I asked Faith is she might like to try tap and be in the same class as the boys. She jumped at the idea. So Team Middle Kids are all in a tap class together and Bethany's class is immediately after theirs. And the very best part? The studio owner gave us killer deal for all these classes. I won't say how much, but I feel like we're committing highway robbery! Sometimes things just work out.
7. When I was a mom with only little kids, every day lasted forever! I remember looking for things to do to fill my time. So much to do, but such monotony as well. Older, more experienced moms would say, "Enjoy it! It goes so fast!".
Really? Really? This doesn't feel like it's going fast!
18 years into this parenting thing and I am SHOCKED at the speed at which time as flown.
Yep, I'm crying again.
And it is just getting faster. Another year from now and Bethany will be getting ready to head to college. Elinor is a freshman in high school-- passionate about swim team.
I think I'm some sort of mourning for the end of this phase of life-- but that doesn't make much sense because Greta is 18 months and I still have roughly 17 years of her being a minor in our house. It's just that now I see how little time that actually is and I'm sort of pitching a big ol' Mom fit about it. Perhaps I will have had my fill of parenting by the time everyone has moved on and I've had 35 years experience. Perhaps I'm emotionally panicking unnecessarily. So unlike me to emotionally panic unnecessarily.
Actually, it is very much like me.
8. Sounds like tomorrow needs to be a day where we all stay in pajamas and read. That sounds lovely. Not possible, but lovely.
9. I thoroughly enjoy reclaiming my bedroom closet this week. It's not a huge closet to begin with, but it was markedly smaller and less accessible with Greta's bed in it. It is easier to keep a tidy room when you have access to your closet. And kids like to come visit with you in a clean room more so than in a messy room. And lately, I really like the kids coming to visit and chat with me. So that's a win/win.
10. Okay, well, this was cathartic for me to blah, blah, blog. Clark, I don't know if you're allowed to check this blog on the mission or not. If you do come across this post, you know I
1 comment:
Ahhh... blog therapy. Feeling jealous. Well written. Hugs to you.
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