Tomorrow is the 10th anniversary of my mom's passing.
Has it really been ten years? It is hard to believe, but Bethany turns ten next month and my mom passed away 5 weeks before she was born. I am planning on crying a lot tomorrow-- that is, if I don't spend all my tears tonight in anticipation of tomorrow.
I feel the loss for me and my family, but I feel the loss acutely for my brother Matt and his wife Misty as they have just welcomed their first baby into the world. I'm sure they are wishing she was here to share in their joy. It's those wonderful life-changing moments that I wish she were here for.
I wish I could call her and tell her about Clark's Lego Team winning.
I wish she could know Faith here on earth. She'd probably wonder how I could possibly have a child as sweet as Faith.
I wish she could be here to do arts/crafty stuff with my Bethany and Elinor. I'm useless in that area.
I wish I could see her laugh at the funny things Cannon says.
She LOVED Abe. She always took his side in early marriage squabbles.
I wish I could have known her as an adult. I was only 23 (barely out of adolescence) when she died, so I feel like I knew her as a mom to a child, but not really as an adult. Fortunately she made many wonderful friends throughout her life who have helped me to understand more of who she really was.
I love her and I miss her. If you had the opportunity to know my mom, you will appreciate this video that Allison Sherman put together last Christmas.
8 comments:
Well, that's a tear jerker! My favorite picture is the one of her hugging you at her wedding. The woman she was shines through in her children. I didn't know her, but she must have been a great mother. I hope you let yourself have a all-day jammie wearing, no-school, chocolate eating, nose blowing day tomorrow. Love ya!
What a sweet video! I know how often you must think of your mom as we do of daddy. There are so many times that I wish he were here for my children, Mary Caroline, and Mom...not necessarily me...meaning I would give my opportunity to be with him up if they could be with him. I think of how different mom's life would be with daddy by her side. Some anniversaries are harder than others.How wonderful to be surrounded by so many that love you though! I know your mom has to be there in spirit!Love you Betsy!
I am so sorry - What a difficult time of year for you. I will be thinking of you all day today. Hang in there - and cry all you want.
Oh Betsy you have me crying. I have been thinking of Allie all morning and all last night. We were truly blessed to have her be apart of our lives even if we only had her for a short time. Thank you for sharing her and your family with mine. I love you and hope that your heart is warm with the many beautiful memories she shared with her.
I wrote this a couple Christmases ago:
"I first met Betsy's Mom in the Salt Lake Airport in March of 1997. Betsy and I were engaged at the time and Alene Clark Cannon had come from Italy by herself to take charge of the wedding preparations.
She was so sweet and kind to me, and we immediately formed a wonderful closeness and friendship. I loved this woman from the start and I didn't have to wait until Betsy and I were married before I very comfortably started referring to her as "Mom".
This Mom from Utah was a FANTASTIC cook! The meals we started having at her house were just AMAZING! And the parties were the BEST! And Christmas was her crowning achievement. You have never celebrated the Holidays in a truly Grand Fashion unless you have celebrated with her!!
I was priviledged to spend the first 4 Christmases of our married lives with this Amazing woman. But during the year 2000 she became very ill, and then early in February 2001, Mom passed away.....she was only 46.
She LOVED so much, and she loved so many things, and I was so blessed to be one of them. She treated me like a Prince and I, hopefully, treated her like the Queen that she was and is!! I love Mom with all of my heart and I miss her most of all during the Christmas Season. She made it so special, just as she made everything and everyone special!!"
I'm crying with you Betsy. What a neat lady, and what heartbreak to miss her so terribly. Abe, your tribute was very touching. Thinking of you all today.
I wish I could have known your mother Betsy. She seems like such a beautiful person. I know you make her super proud every day as she watches you from heaven raising your wonderful family. We love you!
Love,
Mary
The tears are still flowing. I almost had to stop the video because I was crying so hard. I am still crying while typing. I think of the recipes I have hand written by your mom in my little recipe box Sam made me for my wedding. I think of dalmuti at your parents house. I had only played BUM before I met the Cannons and the "true game" of the "great Dalmuti" I will never forget the hats. I remember going out to eat with your parents. Your mom was always so welcoming to me. She always greeted me with a BIG smile and a hug that made me feel like I was welcome any time and that I was loved as if I was one of her children. She had that kind of love for everyone. Betsy your mom was and is a very special person and is doing so much good in the Spirit world. God can use her for so much and your mom will be willing to do so much for God.
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