Hello Friends. To the three of you who occasionally read what I post on here, you may have noticed my postings have been rather sporadic over the last few years. Because... well... life. Lots and lots of life. So much life that it has been hard to keep a record of said life.
For the last few years, "Life" has taken the shape of weddings-- specifically, three weddings in just over two years. To be honest, I don't think I'm going to remember much of the last three years. It's basically looked like this.
--August 2023 Bethany returns from her mission in Texas
--2023 Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas
-- April 2024 Bethany and Ben Wedding
-- 2024 Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas
--September 2025 Elinor and Hunter Wedding
--2025 Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas
--April 2026 Faith and Landen Wedding
The "Wedding" includes the months of dating and engagement leading up to the actual wedding day. The girls were all very happy with their weddings. They were reasonable in what they wanted, and none of them even bordered on becoming a Bridezilla.
But even so. WOW! Weddings are a lot of work, time, money, and BRAIN SPACE! There are so many details to think through, and many of the tasks must be done sequentially.
This is what the wedding chatter inside my brain has been like-- pick a date, see if the venue is available for that date, pick a new date, check on family availability, secure a photographer (photos are HOW MUCH??), schedule engagement photos, find a dress, decide on colors, hemorrhage money, figure out who will be bridesmaids and groomsmen, decide how they are to be attired, go buy flowers from Hobby Lobby (fake flowers are HOW MUCH?), sit down with groom's mom to make sure we're all on the same page, research and make DIY bouquets and boutonnieres, order a bunch of mother-of-the-bride dresses from Amazon (don't forget to return the rejects), decide on reception food and drinks and how to present said food, be emotionally available to the bride-to-be and build a relationship with future son-in-law, tablecloths, centerpieces, backdrop, order of events for the big day, schedule bridal photos, order large prints of bridal photos and pay for expedited shipping to make sure they arrive in time, order the food and cake, remember to get a box for cards, make the photo guest book, make or order wedding favors for the guests, plan the send off (sparklers, fiberoptic wands, bubbles?), make sure LED lights have batteries, remind bride and groom to keep track of gifts for thank-you notes, collect addresses and prep announcements to go out about a month before, make playlists for first dances and dancing at the reception, organize boxes and totes with all wedding paraphernalia...
Oh my word. I am tired just remembering.
During those same three years, I also served as Young Women's president of our church congregation and continued to grow my piano studio.
When I look back at the years of having babies and a house full of little ones, I don't know how we did what we did. On paper, it shouldn't have worked. I strongly believe God sustained and strengthened us. I'm pretty sure I will look back on the last few years with similar feelings.
I'm feeling worn thin-- like I've been functioning in survival mode for too long. Rather than actively making decisions based on what I value and choosing my course, I have been reacting, putting out fires, and just doing what needs to be done when it needs to be done. And I get that that is just how life is sometimes. Yet, there are important but neglected relationships that need some time and attention. The condition of my house definitely needs some TLC. My spiritual studies have suffered, and I think the stress of it all has taken a toll on my body (aren't I too young to get arthritis? How long does frozen shoulder last?)
I am currently finding myself pleasantly curious about the next chapter of my life. We've passed the "Daughters Dating and Getting Married" chapter (happy day!), and we're beginning the "Sons Going on Missions" chapter (hopefully). I'm no longer Young Women's President, and I'm bursting with ideas of expanding my music studio. I am looking forward to having only three kids at home -- to take nothing away from the JOY and EXCITEMENT of a large, bustling brood at home. I loved it. And now I will love this new phase. (Are you telling me every child will have their own room?? That's crazy talk!)
Basically, I feel like, for the first time in quite some time, I might be looking at a little breathing room. I know, I know... knock on wood. But I'm not going to deny myself happy thoughts just because "the other shoe could drop". Rather, I'm quite certain many more shoes are ready and waiting to drop, so I might as well enjoy a good thing when I can:)
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