I Was Wrong Part 2

The next point of mistaken thinking has been deeply embedded in my thought processes for a very long time.   It has been a serious struggle to find and root out. 

To give you some background, I have been a striver, a climber, a high achiever all my life.  I don't ever remember a time when I didn't think about wanting and trying hard to be good at things.  Not just good.  Whatever endeavor I undertook, I wanted to excel.  

I was smart but wanted to be really smart.  I was in a higher grade reading level in elementary school.  I won a Young Authors contest, in fifth grade, a city-wide essay contest,  I remember weeping over a B. I was in honors classes in high school. I graduated from Brigham Young University.  I have voluntarily read markedly more classic literature since ending my formal education, just because I want to understand the world more.  I regularly contemplate the feasibility of going back for a master's degree. 

I played piano and trombone, but I wanted to be really good at music. So when my parents decided I had had enough lessons to be somewhat useful as a pianist, they no longer required I take lessons. So as a teenager, I begged them to please let me take from a really good teacher.  Even now at the age of 45, I run a thriving piano studio and love to practice and drill music theory for fun.

I thoroughly enjoyed marching band and symphonic band in high school.  When I moved halfway through my sophomore year and joined a far superior program than I had come from, I had to work extra hard to catch up, so I did.  But it wasn't enough to just be in the band-- I wanted to be drum major.  So I auditioned and got the job and spent the whole summer preparing.  I knew the music inside and out and I won drum major awards in competitions. 

I was spiritual, but I wanted to be really spiritual.  I read scriptures and prayed and attended early morning seminary and encouraged a Bible study group with friends of other faiths.  I plead for years for my parents to send me to EFY.

I wanted to get married and become a mother so I started having babies.  I bore nine babies.

When considering educational options for said children-- after reading lots of books and attending multiple conferences-- I deemed homeschooling to be, not only an acceptable option if that was my preference, but the option that would be the most effective in creating the superhumans I was confident my offspring would be.  

I wanted a neat and tidy home, so I was drawn to minimalist books and blogs.  If some is good-- less is better!

If I am going to invest time and money in an extracurricular for a child, then I want to find a really good studio/teacher/team, fully commit, and see them get really proficient!

I could go on, but I think I've made my point.  I feel like this way of being is in my nature.  It's how I think and how I like to operate.  I like excellence.  I think it's fun to work hard and see results. I don't share any of this to brag.  In fact, I think there are several problematic aspects to this way of thinking and being. Can it feel frustrating to rarely, if ever, settle into contentment? Yes.  Is there a significant degree of anxiety that I am never doing enough?  Big yes.  No doubt, a psychologist would have a heyday analyzing my need to prove my worth and my lack of self-acceptance.  We'll leave that to a later post as well.  For now, just know that although I feel my efforts regularly fall short of the mark I aim for, mediocrity is never my goal.

 This leads me to the next acknowledgment of my flawed thinking.

  I call it, "Yeah, but if I do it right...". 

In my mind, it was a given that I would be a good mom.  Just as in every other goal I undertook, I would set my mind and energy to parenting and it would go well.  I read books about child development, attachment styles, and sleep training methods.  I carefully noted when developmental milestones were early or late and promptly consulted experts when needed.  I nursed babies for their first year and we responded to their cries immediately. If I was going to do this parenting thing, I was going to do it the right way and do it really well.

You see, I saw lots of other families whose children struggled. 

 With younger kids, it was tantrums, whining, picky eating, not sleeping independently, too much screen time, pacifier use for too long, being painfully shy, or refusing to share toys.

With their tweens it was refusing to do school work, talking back to their parents, dishonesty, not wanting to do chores, and fighting with and teasing siblings.

With teenagers we saw drug use, immorality, ignoring curfews, immodest clothing, sneaking out, gender identity issues, doubts in their family's belief systems, not wanting to spend time with the family, lack of meaningful communication with parents, poor friend choices, too much screen time with video games/social media.

And with the young adults, everything the teenagers were doing, leaving the faith they were raised in, divorce, arrests, questionable relationships and living arrangements,  mental health challenges, unwanted pregnancy, and struggles to keep jobs.

So in all of my youthful pride and blissful ignorance, I had a solution to ensure we did not wind up (through the total fault of our own) with such dreadful children.  We would simply do it right.  I say "WE", but really, I am writing about my thought processes.  We would, in reality, create superhumans.  We would carefully curate their environments and associations.  We would always do sit-down family dinners where open communication would be the supreme law. I would read aloud every day to the children and they would see me reading.  How could they help but develop a strong appreciation for classic literature?  They would all far surpass my musical prowess.  In fact, they would all excel at an instrument and physical activity.  We would surround them with every good and uplifting thing, so that beauty and truth would feel like home to them and they would have no desire to delve into darker places. My daughters would never have a desire to dress inappropriately because I would take them shopping and buy them really cute modest clothing.  We would get to know the families of their friends.  We would travel to enjoy nature and broaden our horizons. We would go to church every week-- even on vacation.  But not just that-- but every single day, without fail, we would have family scripture study and family prayer and never miss a Family Home Evening.  We would make an art out of following the prophet.  We would support our children in their activities and performances.  They would look up into the crowd and know they would see our proud, smiling faces.  It would be our pleasure to mold these children into the best possible versions of themselves. 

 All of these things, and so many more, were elements of my quest for excellence in parenting.  I trusted that my skills in observation and study had already helped me ascertain how to go about parenting and all that was left was to walk that path.   Oh heck, I could do that!  Work hard and watch the results of my efforts pay off?  Sign me up!  I was certain, that if we did it right, our kids would "turn out" great.  More than great.  Superhuman great.  

I mean, other families have these problems with their children, because they didn't do it right.  If they had done it better-- more or less discipline, more or less focus on healthy eating, more or less time at home, more or less time with friends, more diligence in gospel learning, more time tossing the football with dad, less body shaming, a healthier family mindset about money, too much media in the home, more talking and less telling, more traveling to broaden perspectives, less controlling parents, or delayed use of social media.  They could have effectively molded their precious little souls, but for whatever reason, they messed up. 

You get the idea.  While I didn't verbalize my theory, I believed that struggling children were, at least partly, caused by deficient parenting. I mean, maybe the parents were doing the best they could, but it wasn't enough,  and that's too bad.  I bet those parents, in hindsight, would have done things differently, so as to avoid their children having to suffer because of their poor choices.  

Yeah, you can see the problems here.

This way of thinking assumes a few things. 

1.  As a parent, I am not just a factor, but I am the determining factor in my child's mortal experience. 

2.  "Snowplow parenting"-- that is, trying to remove all obstacles and hardships from the path ahead of my child-- is both helpful and possible.  

3.  My efforts alone can provide enough light and goodness to completely, or at least mostly, negate the power of the adversary. 

4.  My children should and will welcome and appreciate my desire to mold them.  

5.  As a smart, capable, and righteous human being, I am capable of the kind of impeccable consistency and vigilance required for preventing ill influences from creeping into their lives.

6.  There exists the one best, right way to parent. (see the previous post)

7.  My spouse must agree with my parenting philosophy and be equally committed to the same level of diligence.  If not, the lack of unity will undermine my efforts. 

8.  Outside forces such as health challenges, economic downturns, and changes in the political climate are no match for the strength and influence of parents who love each other and their children.

9.  My children were given to me as blank slates or lumps of clay for me to mold into something great.

10.  Their becoming superhumans  (being pleasing to both God and man) is of supreme importance.  If I have to sacrifice my relationship with them to help them be their best, so be it.  (thank you, Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother)

11.  The proscribed path to God and success in life is extremely time sensitive and narrowly defined.  It is decidedly and intrinsically problematic to miss milestones or take alternate paths.

12.  I know better and should be better than most of the people around me.  

13.  If I mess up this parenting thing, I will cause irreparable damage to my children's eternal progression.

14.  My children's eternal salvation is your responsibility.

I'm sure there are many more implied and COMPLETELY ERRONEOUS assumptions.  Every single one I listed above is WRONG! 

My expectations were based on my assumptions of what was true or possible.  They have caused me quite a bit of parenting angst over the years, resulting in frustration and stress, strained relationships, anxiety and depression, obsessive efforts, and a diminished ability to enjoy the remarkable spirits I get to share an earthly home with. 

 I have, with varying degrees of success, striven to implement many of my "proper parenting" tactics.  Many, but not all, still make sense and ring true to me.  I feel they have served us well.  So I will continue to strive for excellence in parenting-- it's still who I am and how I like to do things. But here is an updated list of assumptions I find to be more true and much more helpful in my quest to love God and love my neighbor-- in this case my own family.

---I have come to better understand that, for lack of a better description, I am not a God.  How very disappointing, and yet what a relief! I am no one's Savior.  I have God-given gifts and talents, some of which I have striven to develop, but I'm not that good.  Not even close. I am his child, with divine potential to someday be like him through the grace of Jesus Christ.  That's it.  I am not and could never be that good on my own.

---I play "A " role, but not "THE" role in influencing and defining their identity.  So many other factors at play that only increase their pull as children get older. 

---They arrived here on earth with some already-developed traits.  They are who they have always been and who they always will be.  My role is to nurture and encourage and guide as they learn through their experience.  But I don't get to write the store or mold the clay.  That's between God and them. 

---Just like me, they have agency-- the right and power to direct their lives-- given by THE actual God of the Universe.  Trying to control another person is Satan's game.  It's not even possible to control another person and trying to do so never ends well. Also, it's a tough thing to carry the weight of 10 people's agency.  A tough thing and a pointless endeavor.  Agency is non-transferable.

---They are HIS, not mine. They were never given to me.  They were never my possessions.  They were/are my stewardship and my God-given responsibility to care for and teach, but their immortality and eternal life, their eternal growth and progression is HIS work, NOT MINE.  I have a duty to God to do right by them.

---Just because something seems "wrong" doesn't mean anything has gone wrong.  He is the Master of "Making it Work".   The Lord will see to it that we all have the lessons we need to choose HIM.  He is not bound by time and it doesn't matter how long it seems to take for his purposes to be accomplished.  What may appear to our understanding to be lost wanderings, he can and will use to teach and bring forth.  He is playing a really long game and will be merciful and patient with his children. He is the original and best "Seeker of Lost Things"-- because those things aren't actually lost to him.  He knows right where they are and just how to discover their hiding places.  With love, kindness, patience, and gentle invitation, the Lord invites us to be in a relationship with him. 

---Those gentle invitations are how I want to relate to my own family members.  People are God's purpose, not the accolades of the world.  I want to value my loved ones for who they are, not what they do or don't do.

---My children are not mere extensions of, nor reflections of myself.  They are their own persons, and while their life choices may affect me, they do not define me.  

--- God never has and never will  put the onus of responsibility on me for anyone else's eternal standing with Him.  He has asked that for my own development and benefit,  I join him in the work of Salvation-- that is, in bringing souls (including my own) to Christ.  But make no mistake, it is HIS WORK, not mine.  I am not powerful enough to halt or change the direction of his work.  I can and ought to lay down burdens was never meant to carry.  

---Both Abe and I are just as flawed as we are wonderful.  He has different ways of seeing and interacting with the world.  We don't have to agree on everything.  Although I don't always appreciate it, it is best that he doesn't parent just like me.  We've made mistakes-- sometimes the same ones over and over again.  We've struggled in ways I really thought we were too smart to fall for.  We've learned some lessons the really hard way and we will continue to learn forever.   There is progress to be made in the problems of life.  Taking away the opposition also takes away the opportunities for growth and understanding.  Like it or hate it, that's the plan.  My futile attempts to shield my children from struggles, disappointments, and failures were never possible, or helpful.  My own insecurities and struggles to disentangle my identity from theirs have made this challenging for me.  

When I thought, "Yeah, but if I do it right..." I WAS WRONG. In a nutshell, I never could have done it right. I never could have parented well enough or right enough to bypass God's plan for his children.  I was unjust and harsh in my judgment of others and myself.  My assumptions were incorrect and the truth is, He is so much better at His work than I am at His work.   He is so good and since we are his, we are good.  Good and mortal and weak and flawed--the perfect combination in the perfect setting, for He is mighty to save.

I Was Wrong Part 1

 Deep breath.

Another one.

I think I'm pretty much caught up on current event blogging.  I started lagging behind around Halloween, and it has been a struggle for me to find the time or desire to get caught up.  I really do like keeping this blog and find it to be an enjoyable and practical way to record our family history.  However, what I find the most beneficial aspect for me, personally, is the opportunity to reflect-- that is to consciously and intentionally choose how I want to think about myself and my people and the ups and downs of life.

And with that, I now have some time (while sitting at a swim meet for three days) to reflect on the last few months-- nay--the last few years.  They have been quite the ride and they have changed me.  I am not what I once was.

A few years back, when my kids were all younger, it was enjoyable and often humorous to share the woes of parenting young children.  I could air my grievances on Facebook or this blog.  You may remember a little series a while back entitled, "Why Peter is Melting Down".  Funny stuff.   Lots of moms could relate, and in turn, share what adorably frustrating antics their little darlings were up to.  I could publicly share my challenges at book clubs, girls' nights out, family gatherings, church functions, or pretty much anywhere and with anyone who would listen.  It was so satisfying to feel so heard and understood and to know I wasn't alone in my struggles.

And then Clark hit (my oldest) hit the teenage years, and I realized he was his own person, not just an extension of me.  I needed to respect his privacy and his right to speak for himself in the world.   It wouldn't be right for me to publicly air my worries/frustrations about his growing pains.  Even though, his growing pains seemed to be the source of my growing pains, I no longer felt at liberty to share my experiences so openly.  That change in how I thought of him didn't happen overnight, it was a process-- and a rather uncomfortable process at that.  So while I know I overstepped that boundary far too often, it has been my intention to honor his individual identity.  However poorly I executed those intentions.   

My oldest always craved independence.  Autonomy seemed to be his number one desire.  He was always an adult trapped in a child's body and consequently, the older he got, the more comfortable he became in his own body.  So while it seemed he relished and embraced his newfound self-direction, I was reeling inside.  I don't believe my experience is singular, rather I'm guessing lots of moms can relate to the discomfort of somewhat unwillingly passing the torch of control to their offspring.  

Was the discomfort of this transition exacerbated by the decision to homeschool?  To take on such a weighty responsibility as both parent and chief educator?  Perhaps.  But that is a post for another day. 

At this stage of my life, the ages of my living children are 23, 21, 19, 16, 14, 12, 8, and 6.  Three children are out of the house.  

The two youngest are in that magical stage of childhood wherein there are no diapers, no bedwetting, independent bathing and grooming, independent running to friends' houses to play, and independent reading.  Tantrums are minimal to non-existent, sibling squabbles are easily resolved, and compliance with parental requests is relatively painless and prompt. 

The middles are in the calm before whatever their form of stormy adolescents will take.  I won't think about that right now.  And I won't go into any detail (see previous paragraphs), but #4 is just about to turn 17, and at this point, all four of the oldest kids have surprised and stunned me and delighted and disappointed me.  They've each done just what I dreamed and envisioned they would do, and they've done what I hoped and imagined they would NEVER do.  

For about ten years I've been worrying, pondering, praying, studying, listening, and striving to understand my role as a parent, my stewardship to my children, my relationship and duty to our Heavenly Father, my respect for myself, my identity as an individual, daughter, wife, mother, sister, friend, member of my church congregation, neighbor.  

For my own benefit, I'm going to discuss a few ideas I've come to believe I was wrong about and what I think is a more helpful, healthy way to think about myself and life in general.

Where did I ever get the idea that there is a right and best way to be in the world?  I think I've always believed this.  I'm not referring to honoring and obeying the commandments of God.  For me, those are non-negotiable.  The existence of god and our relationship with him is foundational to my beliefs.  Rather, I'm meaning that some personalities, preferences, interests, hobbies, characteristics, fashion choices, socio-economic standings, professions, lifestyles, and family systems were inherently superior and more desirable, while others were less worthy or good.  

I have spent a lot of mental, physical, emotional, and physical energy (both consciously and unconsciously) pursuing this best, right way to be and live.  Growing up in the military, with frequent moves and life "restarts", it was critical to be able to quickly read a setting, note who the important players were, and figure out how to integrate myself.  My social standing depended upon it.  And I was good at it.   And then I majored in sociology in college so I could formally study the science of how groups of people behave based on their characteristics.  So I got even "better".  I came out of college even better equipped to, equal parts, envy or judge people's life choices and lifestyles.  

But I think I got it wrong.  My 8 children have vastly different personalities.  They look different.  Their gifts and talents are different.  They each relate to me differently.  They don't like to wear the same clothing styles.  Some like to clean bathrooms.  Some loathe sweeping the kitchen floor.  Some like to stay up late and then sleep in Some relish the early mornings.  Some are tender-hearted, some are witty, some are without guile, some have very active intellects, some are very creative, some are very athletic, some are highly driven, some are so kind, some are very sensitive to spiritual things, some read people well, some can remember anything they ever read in minute detail, some are leaders, some are remarkable friends, some are introverts, and some are extroverts.  You get the idea.  I adore them all.  I think they are magnificent and interesting.  I think they are all destined for great things.  I would never suggest that one of them is better than another.  

God delights in us as individuals.  The plants and animals were, at least in part, created to beautify and give variety to the earth.  The purpose of our mortality is to come to a place (earth) where we could learn from our experience to choose the good over the evil.   And that can be accomplished in a very wide variety of experiences.  If the Lord can consecrate any "affliction" for our gain, then surely he can do the same with any personality, personal preference or prosperity marker.  

The Lord esteems all flesh as one.  He does not value some kinds of people over other kinds of people.  He treasures the receptionists, athletes, chefs, musicians, engineers, cashiers, lawyers,  professors, marketers, janitors, CEO's, policemen, politicians, teachers, prostitutes, accountants, models, and truck drivers.

He adores the gregariously outgoing, the contemplative, the comedic relief givers, the patient listeners, the philosophers, the organizers, the goal setters, the creative geniuses, the considerate souls, the make-it-happen dynamos, the take-time-to-smell-the-flower folks, the happy-go-lucky, the nervous Nellies, the fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants people, the cross-every-t-dot-every-i-types, those who like to schedule their every waking moments, and those who are easily overly stimulated need plenty of down time.  He likes how we are.  He sees value in all these characteristics.  He can and does use all kinds to move his purposes along.  

He delights to see us enjoying snowboarding, drawing, mountain biking, bull-riding,  snake-charming, magic tricks, amusement parks, recording and listening to podcasts, directing movies, building blanket forts, home decorating, gardening, running, performing in marching bands, golfing, acting, singing, dancing, writing, taking photos, surfing, building sand castles, playing board games, watching movies, painting, fishing, doing hair and nails, pleasure reading, adventuring on a D&D campaign, or anything virtuous, lovely, of good report or praiseworthy.  He has provided so many options for enjoying our sojourn on earth.   We won't have time to chase every worthy pursuit, and we might not enjoy all of them even if we could.  But how good of him to provide such an endless array so that we could choose what we want to do.

Someone else being or doing something that I am not doing DOES NOT MEAN I am missing out or doing anything wrong.  Nowhere does God say you should be like your neighbor.  Love our neighbor?  Yes.  Be like them?  No.  Rather than looking around to see what kind of life and way of thinking we should adopt, it is markedly better to look to ourselves and ask "What do I desire?"  And infinitely better to ask God, "What desirest thou?"  It is highly unlikely that either will match the desires of or for your neighbor.  

Moving forward, I hope to experience gratitude for who I am and who everyone around me is-- First and foremost --A CHILD OF GOD.  In this life, I, and everyone around me, will take on many other titles or labels that are chosen or are assigned by others-- They will be of a wide variety, many of which are pleasing to God.  Not a problem.  Not one of them will ever supercede the truth that God, the Father and His Son Jesus Christ love us, adore us, delight in us and like us.  We don't get to decide how God feels about us.  We aren't that powerful.  He is ever merciful and I suggest even his "justice" is in fact, his merciful methods to bring our hearts and minds to a rememberance of who he is and who we are in relation to him.

Our value as His children is set and non-negotiable.  We can look to him to learn of not only our individual identity and worth, but to understand the fundamental value of every single person.  Rather than feeling envious or judgmental of those we see around us, or feeling we should be more like them, with God's grace, we, too, can learn to love, treasure, adore, and delight in the differences that beautify and give variety to God's children.  

 

Abe Astair and Betsy Rogers

 

Thanks to my dear Andrea and her expert instruction we hosted a ward activity just before Valentine's Day-- Vintage Dancing!

We had a great turn out and an excellent time was had by all.  Cannon was one of the few youth that came, and afterwards, he said, "I was a doubter, but that actually was really fun."  So there you have it.

There was one unfortunate incident, when in our dancing exuberance, Abe elbowed my in the forehead and I got an immediate and quite painful goose egg.  Small price to pay:)

On Valentine's day we got to do more dancing!   Andrea hosted an evening of dinner and dance instruction.  Abe and I like to joke that a couples social dance class we signed up for at BYU was nearly the death of our marriage right when we got started.  Something about the class and dancing together just didn't work for us.  Well, it wasn't the class, it was us.  We quickly decided we had better drop the class for our marriage's sake.  So this evening of dancing together and enjoying it SO MUCH was 25 years and lots of living in the making.  I guess we're both (mostly me) a little easier to work with than we used to be.

So much fun and we weren't too shabby.  In this picture, the instructor is using me to demonstrate.  

Good friends are the best.

And speaking of dances, Faith (the girl in the middle) had a really fun time at the Sweethearts dance for Skyridge High School.  Not her high school, but since she is homeschooled, she doesn't much care what school it was for.  She went with a group of swim friends and her date Jan (pronounced "yawn") is an exchange student from Switzerland.  He speaks German and some English.  He is on her Lehi Aquatics team.

Behold, the corsage and boutonniere yours truly procured the day of the dance because the homeschooler and the foreign exchange student didn't get the memo of how these things are customarily done.  And, if I may say, I accomplished said task even while being "not highly favored" by said homeschooler.  Go me. #momsareawesomelikethat

Snowshoeing Is So Fun

 

Abe and I had the BEST time going snowshoeing up around Tibble Fork a couple weeks ago.  

We went with Russ and Stephanie Hansen because 1. We like hanging out with them and 2. They had extra snow shoes and knew where to go.  

I really love hiking and snowshoeing is basically winter hiking in snow.  I want more!

Sometimes our path was rather adventurous!

It was breathtakingly beautiful.  Just what my soul needed.

I had only been snowshoeing once before and I really love it so much! I can't wait to go again.  Good thing we just got a ton more snow, so hopefully it will be around in the mountains a little longer.  Next up, I want to try cross-country skiing.

When Last We Met

 When last we met, I shared about a Regions swim meet that took place near the end of January.  As I write this, we are now near the end of February, and I sit at yet another swim meet.  This one is a three-day Utah Senior State Championship down in St. George.  Just Faith and I are on this trip and she will be on deck with her team for most of the time each day.  Which leaves me with many, many hours to self-entertain in the stands.  To be honest, I am more than okay with this arrangement.  I'm quite looking forward to the next few days.  My backside-- not so much.  

I love this picture of George and several Deacons from the ward.   I see four good friends- sticking together, supporting, and helping each other. 

Behind them, are shadows-- technically their shadows,--but I see the darkness representing darkness, challenges, the hard things in life, the adversary.  Visible, but of no actual substance.  Frightening, but unable to actually cause harm or halt progress.  

But behind those shadows, is the decidedly larger, solid, immovable, unyielding structure of the temple.  The building with the firmest foundation, where they will go to formally enter into a relationship with their Heavenly Father.  He is all substance, and his work is to help us progress.  

Our good friends, the Snows have season tickets to BYU basketball-- and sometimes they are very good to us and offer us tickets they aren't able to use.  A little while back, Abe took Peter and Greta down to a game.

Their first Cougar Tail

I think Greta's face is saying-- hey, that's too big of a bite!  #largefamilytroubles

Don't worry, Greta-- there is enough for everyone:)

It's a terribly blurry picture, but this was the funniest thing about the evening.  Faith was also down at the game, on a double date.  What are the chances that in that whole huge arena, our gang would end up sitting RIGHT IN FRONT OF FAITH and her gang?  Oh, the horror!  Actually, they were really good sports about it and everyone had a good laugh.  

Occasionally, George has a little babysitting job at our house for a cutie little neighbor kid.  They are pretty much best friends:)

Greta was very industrious at the Museum of Natural Curiosity.

George and Ryder played a Trade-it-Up game recently.  They started with a penny and went around the neighborhood, seeing who was willing to trade for something of more value.  They stopped the game after several rounds because they had acquired this little beauty-- a dog skeleton with red, light-up eyes and an electronic barking noise.   Surely nothing could be of more value than that!

Our dog Grover got seriously spooked!

Not too long ago, Cannon asked me, "If I will juggle for 10 minutes straight, can I get 10 minutes off my piano practice time?"

Okay.  Go for it.  So he did.  It turns out juggling for 10 minutes straight is more physically exhausting than he anticipated.

Greta tried to make the same deal if she did the splits for 10 minutes.  Alas, she didn't have the patience to sit there for that long.  No deal.  Peter also offered to do ballet jumps for 10 minutes.  When he stopped at the three-minute mark to get a drink of water, I told him the deal was off.  He was grossly offended.

Regions Swim Meet 2023

 

We are headed toward the end of the high school swim season.  Faith had good races at the last regular season meet.  Click her to see her 200 IM.

Faith is 3rd from the bottom.

It might seem hard to understand why a swimmer can get so excited about the improvement in such tiny increments of time.  But half a second (or less) in a race is an eternity and usually means the difference between several finishing places.  Any improvement in time is cause for great celebration.  Much more important than what place you get in the race

The following week was 6A Region 3 Championships.  This is a very important meet for the swimmers.  They taper for it-- meaning they really rest and fuel their bodies leading up to it.  They somehow get their bodies into very tight (and very expensive) tech suits and they drop time like CRAZY!  Generally, they don't improve on their times during the season, because they are working their bodies so hard.  Then they finally give them a break and a little time to heal.  It is so satisfying to see so much hard work pay off.

I don't recommend an arm wrestling contest with her.  She's been able to beat me for years.  Also, this happy face came just after a spectacular swim in the 100 butterfly, earning her a 2nd place finish.  She also bested her PR by over 2 seconds.  

Here is the video-- she is the fourth lane from the top in a white cap

She also dropped time and got 3rd in the 100 back.  

This was quite the speedy little 4x100 freelay.  They got first place! 

She swam and medalled in all four races she was in.  Next up will be highschool State Championships in a couple weeks.

Riverton girls were Region Champs!  The boys were 2nd.  

Coach Powers is pretty great!

January 2023 Part 2

 

Central Utah Ballet's Senior Company participated in YAGP.  Click here to see a video of a parent performance they did just previous to the competition.

It doesn't happen often, but it is such a treat when it does-- going out with the former Stake Young Men's Presidency that Abe was a part of a few years back.  We are all still good friends, and there are not many people I enjoy more than this group.  Good, good people.

Elinor and I had the best time visiting Asian City-- a supermarket for all things Asian.  We went in preparation for Korean New Year on Feb. 22nd.  We had invited Brandon's family over to celebrate and we wanted to get some Korean snack foods.  I was not brave enough to actually try to cook any Korean food.  But I will say, there are some really tasty treats to be had at Asian City!  I had to remind myself that just because I can't read the entire food label, does not mean I ought to eat as much as I want of said treat.

We had a lovely time-- we ate, we played games and it was great to get to know them better.

They taught us an advanced Korean version of Rock, Paper, Scissors.  It was way fun!

Peter and his buddies.  I adore this picture.

Abe had a birthday!

We had a little family dinner and celebration.

Greta had her first real violin recital last weekend.  She did so well.  Click here to hear her performances.

We love her teacher, Diane, so much!

Peter did well at his taekwondo testing last weekend.  He is on the last belt before his black belt but it takes about six months to be able to test for his black belt.