Keep On Keeping On

He saved a tortoise crossing the road.  I miss this guy and am so happy he will be coming home in less than three months.  Considering how fast the fall season passes, he's practically coming home next week!  Not quite, but close enough.

I am totally and completely in love with these two.  After  class this week the teacher asked if Peter has ever taken a dance class before because he was doing so well.  He does have beautiful pointy- toes.
What is it with our boys and dance??  I love it!

Good buddies or squeezing to death?  One in the same.

Cannon is doing a drone videography class and he's really digging his drone.

We recently celebrated the first Pumpkin Chocolate Chip Cookie Day of the season.  It's so wonderful.  I make a ginormous batch and then we eat cookies or all our meals that day.  Hey, they have eggs and vegetables in them.  That's well balanced.

A tender mercy that Greta discovered Bethany's old dolls under the bed the week after Bethany left for college.  That did my heart much good.

Daddy and the little kids on an outing to Farm Country at Thanksgiving Point.

That's a happy little girl.

Peter liked his horse's mohawk.

We've been enjoying some lovely fall weather.

We went to Victoria's mission farewell last Sunday.  She is a great friend of Bethany's and her family owns the dance studio where the boys started dance.   We love Victoria and her family.

My buff girls having a pull up competition.  I like how Faith's legs are straight and Elinor's are bent because she is so tall.

Abe, Elinor, and Zach at the Speech and Debate opening social last night.  Zach is a great friend to Clark, Bethany, and Elinor.  We love him.  His parents were in Vegas with us as well.

Last but not least-- some pictures of our wonderful Bethany and her darling room mate.  We are really missing her here at home.  It's made easier knowing she is having a great time up at school, but even so, this business of children growing up and leaving home is rough on the mom heart.

It is such a treat to get messages and phone calls from her these days.

Fall Water Polo 2019

We left Las Vegas Saturday morning and arrived in Cedar City just in time for Elinor's 2nd water polo game of the day.  Herriman teams left home super early Saturday morning to get there for the one day tournament.

Cute Raven (Andrea's daughter) attends SUU and she joined us for the game.  She's basically another daughter to us and it was lovely to spend time with her.

We are in the thick of fall water polo season for these two beautiful gals.  Elinor is playing Varsity and JV and Faith is playing on the 14 and under team.  Friday nights and Saturdays are filled with lots of games for them and lots of dance classes for the boys.  And I wouldn't have it any other way:)

Elinor usually plays goalie for the Varsity team and she's been playing field for the JV.  At her Friday night game she scored 5 of the 8 points for the win!  It was so fun to watch.

Such fun, cute, tough girls.

I am so happy Elinor and Faith get to do this water polo/ swimming thing together.

Faith is just itching for more time in the pool.  She really wanted to start practicing at 5:00 am with the high schoolers in addition to her development teams practices in the afternoons.  I told her she was welcome to go ask the coach if she could.  So she did and he said she could.  So there you go.  It's never hurts to ask.

Well, it is going to hurt waking up at 4:20, but she can't wait.

Abe and Betsy Meet Donny and Marie

I drove home from Rexburg on Thursday and went home for one hour to hug my babies.  Then Abe and I took off for a trip to Las Vegas that we'd had planned for months.  No offense to the many good people who live in the Las Vegas area, but I DO NOT LIKE Las Vegas-- so what would induce me to go there?  Especially when I was... shall we say... in a fragile state of mind after dropping off Bethany.

How about DONNY AND MARIE!!!!!  Several months ago they announced they'd be closing their Vegas show in November.

 Andrea, (left of Donny) knowing Abe is a very big Donny Osmond fan,
 turned to Abe and said-- "We are going!"
This wonderful group began as a book club, but now they are just our people.

These are our freakishly happy faces upon realizing we had front row seats and passes for a meet and greet after the show!

And here we are feeling young and hot, because seriously, compared to most of the crowd we really were younger and dare I say, hotter!  Ha ha ha! Kidding.

Abe totally hogged Donny all to himself in the meet and greet!

Look-- Marie looks concerned!  Why does Abe not want to talk to her?  Why only Donny?
Abe had a story he had to quickly tell Donny about who told who when and where to sit down.  It involved a Huey Lewis concert 21 years ago and and overly exuberant Abe at that evening's show.  Clearly, Donny was amused:)

 I have given Andrea a new nickname-- "The Dream Maker".  Abe seeing this show likely would not have happened without her.  We thought we were paying for regular tickets-- how silly of us.  We should have known better.  Andrea had other plans and surprised us all with the Meet and Greet.  Such a fun memory.

We all went out for a very hearty breakfast at Mr. Momma's.  I highly recommend.

Inspired by my pirate themed glow-in-the-dark golf outing up in Rexburg with Bethany, we decided to look for a miniature golf place in Vegas.

This one happened to be KISS themed.  It might be hard to believe, but none of this group were really big KISS fans.  No matter.  We stayed and played.

And it was pretty fun!  I liked that my nails glowed in the dark:)

We spent the afternoon chilling at the pool.

Originally, I wasn't very happy to have this trip happen the same week as taking Bethany.  In the end, it was probably the best thing for me because I was very distracted from my sadness.

And each of these beautiful souls has sent grown children out into the world, so they could empathize.  We were in good company.

I have been very thankful for a kind and understanding husband as we pass through these new parenting stages together.

The Rest of the Long Story

Hello Friends.  When last we met I was telling you about me bawling my eyes out over dropping Bethany off at college at BYU- Idaho.  Here's a little update:  Three days into classes and she is slaying this college thing.  Specifically, she only missed half a point on the music theory test she needed to take to get into a musicianship class.  So yeah, I think she's doing just fine.  I have cried more than she has, so that seems healthy. 
I wasn't the one who actually helped her move into her apartment and took her to Walmart to buy her groceries. 

That honor goes to this beautiful lady-- Rebecca.  By the way, I have had wonderful women named Rebecca in my life.  Why did I not name a child Rebecca?  I hope to have a granddaughter someday named Rebecca.  But I digress. 
Many month ago Abe and I made plans with friends to go to Las Vegas to see the Donny and Marie show before it closes in November.  Come to find out, our tickets were for the very day Bethany needed to move into her apartment.  It was devastated and determined that I wouldn't be able to go to Vegas with Abe our friends.  Abe said, "No WAIT! (he does love his Donny and Marie after all).  We can figure out a solution". 
He started sending messages and making phone calls.  In the end, it was arranged that I would take Bethany up to Rexburg a couple days early and we'd stay in hotel one night.  Then I would drop her off at Rebecca's house in Idaho Falls to stay for one night.  Rebecca was already planning to host Moses (Bethany's 2nd cousin on Abe's side) whose family lives in Mozambique with the State Department.  Moses's family and their family are close family friends for generations.  So she kindly offered to host and take both Bethany and Moses to Rexburg and get them situated.   

Bethany adores Moses and was happy to get to hang out with her fellow cousin and fellow freshman.  Here they are in front of Moses's apartment.
That's kind of a long explanation for this wonderfully kind deed.  I was still rather uncomfortable-- just because I didn't know Rebecca at all and I was already a mess about leaving Bethany.  Thanks to Facebook mutual friends, I was so happy to learn that Rebecca went to jr. high and high school and was close friends with my very favorite cousin and his wife.  And then to make the connection even more interesting-- her niece and her niece's husband are the managers of Bethany's apartment complex.  In the end, Bethany felt very comfortable with Rebecca's family and everything worked out perfectly.  I am so thankful!

She sent us this picture of her and her roommate preparing these gourmet hamburgers.  Good to know she is still eating:)

Dressing up with roommates.  I don't know the story and frankly, I'm not sure I want to know the whole story of why she is dressed as Pete's Dragon.  But either way, it's good to see she is still having fun:)

Betsy Births Another Young-Adult

Remember back when Clark left on his mission and I cried for four months-- multiple times a day! And I'm not a depressive personality type-- so that's not really my M.O.  When I finally started to pull myself back together I figured that the trouble had been me, mourning the loss of our family as I had known it.  It wouldn't ever be the same again.  And at the time, I couldn't imagine family life could ever be better than it was right then-- everyone living under one roof with so much laughter and activity and chaos.  I felt that we had reached the pinnacle of family life enjoyment. 
But I was wrong.  Clark grew and developed and has flourished.  The "rise to power" of the Foxy Ladies and those relationships has been one of the greatest joys of my life.  Our family has been greatly blessed during Clark's service.  Every single person is in a better place than they were when he left.

So on the eve of Bethany's departure for BYU-Idaho, I had very similar feelings to when Clark left almost two years ago.  THIS IS SO GOOD!  I don't see how it can get any better than this.  Gratefully, I have a little more perspective now than I did then.  Regardless of how I am feeling, I firmly believe and have hope that God is all about an ever-widening, ever-increasing, ever-upward trajectory.  He can make all things work together for our good.  He can make this good for Bethany and good for me and good for our family.  I will shed my tears and hurt from the separation of a dear daughter, whom I treasure and delight in, but I am anxious and curious to see how He will make us bigger and better than we all were before. 

So as she has been meticulously planning and packing and preparing, I've been grieving the end of a beautiful era.   Please understand, I don't want her to stay at home.  She doesn't really fit here as a child in our home anymore.  I have treasured the advice my aunt gave me about young adults--
1.  They need to spread their wings and your house isn't large enough.
2.  Young adulthood is messy;  it's best if you don't observe it close up.
I think that is some dang good advice. 

So with that, she and I were off on a two day adventure north to Rexburg, Idaho. 

It was absolutely heavenly.  ALL THE FEELS!  We laughed a lot.  We cried a lot.  We talked about things of eternal significance and little things that humored and entertained us.  We listened to her perfectly curated playlist entitled, "Bethany's gone"-- filled with 50 songs perfectly suited to pull the heart strings and buoy up a young lady leaving home for the first time. 

We couldn't move her into her apartment quite yet (a rather long and boring story that I'll touch on later).  But we went by and peeked in the windows.  It is super close to campus-- especially to the buildings where she will have classes.  Abe did a really good job of helping her figure out where to live and which classes to register for as a music major. 
We visited the bookstore and walked all around campus finding each of her classrooms. 

We had some time to kill that evening.  We considered a movie... nah.
We saw a sign for pirate-themed, glow-in-the-dark miniature golf.  Awww, yeah!

And then we got silly and we had so much fun together. First it was miniature golf...
I don't want to brag or anything, but I totally won.

... which went so well, that next we tried bowling.  Bethany is one of, if not the worst bowlers I've ever had the misfortune to bowl with!  Kidding... not kidding.  She won't be offended that I said that.  But on her last frame she got a strike and followed it with two more strikes! What the heck?  It was a miracle!  I still won, but not by much.

Next up:  Virtual reality.  For the record, she wiped the floor with me in Beat Saber.  Not even a contest.

Air hockey and Big Buck went in Bethany's favor as well. 

Dance-Dance-Revolution surprisingly went to me!  Mostly because it was hard for Bethany to do any "dance" moves that were that simple and slow.  No matter-- I'll take it!
After our fun and games we grabbed some dinner at Del Taco (you know I had me some chicken soft tacos:) We stayed at a local hotel and watched a silly movie I'd rather not confess to at this time and had our final mother/daughter snuggle and cried some more.  Don't judge.  We are both criers when we need to process a lot of emotion.  We kept acknowledging to each other that nothing was "wrong" per say.  Rather we were just so grateful to how good it has been.  We've been lucky and blessed and we know it.

Forgive me while I gush for a minute.  She made raising her too easy.  She has been a contented soul.  Happy.  Responsible.  Kind.  Talented.  Driven.  Playful.  Cool.  Authentic.  Organized.  Smart.  Beautiful.  Sensitive.  Spiritual.  Obedient.  A friend to many, including her parents.  An example.  We have been so fortunate to have her in our home for 18 short years.  I relish being in her company.  Talking and laughing with her. 
The next morning it was time to say goodbye and I was sort of a mess.  She told me how comfortable she already felt at BYU-Idaho.  We agreed over and over how wonderful it was for her to be there.  How well she was going to do.  I told her again how proud and happy Abe and I were for her.  How she was prepared and entering college under ideal circumstances with full tuition scholarship.  How exciting a time this is.  And we kept saying, "It couldn't be better."  And we meant it. Everything about the situation is ideal, and yet I could't stop crying and it broke my heart to say goodbye. 
Oh!  For crying out loud!  I know I am high drama right now!
But hear me out.  I worked out a little theory.  I call it the theory of Birthing Young Adults.  I thought about this when we were having lunch with Jesse (Abe's just younger brother ) and his wife Amy just a couple weeks ago.  We both have a 20 year old and an 18 year old.  We used to sit for hours and talk about our babies and what we were going to name them and what they looked like and what their little personalities were.  What stages of development they were in, what they liked to eat, how many hours a night they slept. 
And now we found ourselves sharing what our new young adults were up to.  What were their plans for school?  Where were they living?  Who were they hanging out with?  How were they relating to their families?
We are in this new phase and it felt like we were all done birthing babies and now we are birthing these adults. 
For 17 years I was having babies.  Roughly every 2 or 3 years I got pregnant and I grew a baby inside of me for nine months.  That baby was completely physically dependent on me for nourishment and oxygen and everything.  For me, pregnancy is scary.  Because you know the time is going to pass, but it is going to be uncomfortable from day one until that horrible day of labor and delivery.  If you are one of those remarkable women who love laboring and delivering babies, then perhaps you will not relate.  But I think most of you ladies who have birthed a baby will agree.  It is unpleasant.  You know it has to happen to get the baby here and you know there is no other option.  And you know it is TOTALLY WORTH IT.  That baby is going to grow and the moment WILL come when it's time for that baby to physically separate from you.  But it is time.  That baby doesn't fit inside you so well anymore and you really don't want to stay pregnant.  You just dread the moment of separation because it's risky and it's going to hurt.  You will birth an infant and you will be so ecstatically happy to hold that baby that is now separate from you.  But the event of separation is painful and you'd avoid it if you could.
I suggest that the senior year of high school (whatever kind of school that is) is roughly nine months of preparing to birth your young adult.  That child has been physically separate from you for a long time (since they were born) but they have been tied to you with emotional strings that have kept them always in your thoughts and concern.  You've had a strong emotional stewardship.  That last year you are getting ready to birth your young adult.  It takes months to get college or mission plans in place.  You know the moment of separation is coming and you know it is going to be painful.  Your young adult isn't fitting in the household very well, because they have gotten a little too big for the parent/child relationship you've always known.  You know the separation is necessary and good, but it's going to hurt to say goodbye.  But then you get to meet them!  You get to see who they are and what they want to do.  Just as you want to see who your baby grows into as a child, you want to see who your grown up child is.  What will they do? 

That's how it's been with Clark and Bethany.  I had dreaded that moment of emotional separation of saying goodbye-- of the change in the nature of the parent/child relationship.  And I'll be honest, it was pretty rough on Thursday with Bethany.  I have cried A LOT.  These young people have become so much a part of who I am, that to say goodbye feels as though I emotionally cut off part of my soul.  Like my soul has a flesh wound where they were ripped off.  I am not suggesting my feelings are good or bad or reasonable or healthy-- that's just the best way I can think to describe it.  I know I'll continue on and throw myself into running our house and loving the six kids (thank goodness) who I still get to love on here at home.  To be honest, once that wound heals a little, I will probably appreciate having a little less on my plate with one less person to keep track of and one less person's schedule I need to follow. 
I love Clark and I love Bethany and I am excited to watch them pass through adult stages and continue to grow and develop.  I feel so blessed to have them in our family.  The way they have bravely led out in setting an example for younger siblings is awesome. 
So now, roughly every 2 or 3 years I will birth an adult.  Hopefully I'll get a little more used to it and won't be quite so high drama.  And like pregnancy it will be exciting and challenging and horrible at times and totally and completely the best thing I've ever done.  It will be worth every single  discomfort and tear shed to see these beautiful young people continue to become who God knows they are.