Don't Worry, Be Happy

 I am loving this summer.  Why does that feel like a brave and somewhat brazen thing for me to say?

I used to not let myself be too happy during happy times.  I feared feeling foolish when, inevitably, something in life could would go wrong.  As if, somehow, it was shameful to allow myself joy and happiness, when it could so easily be dashed when the other shoe drops. If feeling happy-- dare I say "deliriously happy" at times--  wasn't going to be permanent, then it was folly to dabble in it at all.  Somehow, it felt morally wrong to experience such bliss, and God would "punish" me for allowing myself unrestricted delight and pleasure.  Declaring how much I'm enjoying something, would be asking God to take it away.  Just begging for trouble.  

I DON'T FEEL THAT WAY ANYMORE.

Because I now understand that my personal growth is dependent on both the good and bad, the happy and sad, the easy and hard, the light and the dark-- I can better accept both.  I can accept God's LOVING kindness, in whatever form it takes.  I know that He is always good and He will always help me grow through the hard times.  I believe God wants me to thoroughly soak in the happiness and joy to be had in the world.  Tough times don't come because I was foolish enough to acknowledge I was happy.  Tough times come because I'm a human being having and human experience.  God doesn't delight in humbling me in my ridiculous prideful joy.  I believe he knows my struggles are a critical part of my mortality, and thus he allows opposition.  But I also believe he delights in my delight, similar to my delight when we give a gift that is thoroughly enjoyed and appreciated.  God created all things and it is a joy to him when I find the joy he intended.  

When I'm feeling happy and peaceful, I celebrate how it is RIGHT NOW.  And when times are tough, as in fact, they inevitably will be, I will accept that that's how it is RIGHT NOW.   I trust HIM and I thank HIM for His kindnesses.  So today, I unabashedly rejoice and exclaim-- I'M LOVING THIS SUMMER.  There.  I said it.  And I mean it.